Sunday, October 7, 2007

Lonely but Never Alone

I grew up as an only child, so for the most part, I've always managed to entertain myself. My parents liked to take long road trips on the weekends, and often we would end up at a place that had nothing but adults so I had to find ways to keep from being bored.

As I became older, and started working in corporate America, I found that companies wanted someone who was a team player, so I had to conform. And when I eventually wanted a career instead of a job, my first choice was to become a singer. However, whether you're a part of a group or a soloist, you're never alone. You're either surrounded by background singers or musicians and of course your audience.

But when you decide that you want to have a career as a writer, you've probably come to the realization that there will be many days and nights of isolation and unless you've decided to co-write a novel or a screenplay, being alone is the standard existence for writers.

Because I grew up as an only child, the thought of being isolated when I decided to switch my career goals to writing did not bother me in the least. I can't write when there are others around, because I need complete peace. Often I may stay at work when everyone leaves instead of going home. My friends constantly ask me why I choose to write at work and when I try to explain to them that the constant walking of my neighbors above me, the passing by of loud music from cars, the sound of music or television coming from a neighbor's apartment or even children playing on the streets can become a distraction for me, some don't get it.

So mostly I crave the loneliness, but there are a few times where it becomes unendurable leaving me a little gloomy.

That's when my characters come alive and I spend hours with them and eventually they become my best friends and the loneliness disappears.

So next time you find yourself getting a little dispirited from your writing seclusion, talk to your characters. Just like spending time with your friends and family, it can help you find out many things about them including; their personalities, traits, likes and dislikes and basically what makes them who they are. Then the solitude will disappear and as a bonus you'll end up with richer and more rounded characters.

How do you handle the loneliness of writing?